Godina izdanja: Ostalo
ISBN: Ostalo
Jezik: Engleski
Autor: Strani

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In `Staying True` by Jenny Sanford, the Palmetto State`s first lady provides such intimate perspective into her and the governor`s long marriage that readers may sympathize for both parties.

Among the insights shown is that, in their early years, Mr. Sanford`s biggest mistake as a husband might have been urging his wife to become involved in his political career as his free campaign manager. This eventually took the romance out of their marriage, as she became his adviser. Even as his affair became fodder for the press, the governor was calling his wife for advice rather than to take care of her feelings. He involved her in shaping his public image too much for her to be the soulmate he longed for.

What Ms. Sanford did right all along was to take care of herself. Unlike him, she reserved time for introversion, meditation, yoga, journaling and reading, which shines through in the book`s varied inspirational and literary quotations from the yogis to the Bible`s best. Her selections show wide reading. Between thrilling scenes from frenetic campaigns and her swift ride along the VIP lane to emerge into a political convention`s enthusiastic crowds, she often recalls her solitary walks along the beach, comparing her small problems with the ocean`s calm expanse. The governor`s schedule crowded out such time for his self care.

Ms. Sanford interprets her husband`s focus on conservative principles as causing him to lose sight of his personal values. This shows she, at least, tried to understand his needs. People need to feel a healthy mix of both conservation and change, stability and progress. Feeling he had always lived out of duty, the governor, in his intense conservatism, probably bored himself into needing the `exotic` relationship with the Brazilian Maria Belen. Having made his wife part of the conservative political world that consumed too much of his time, Sanford`s self-neglected side was drawn to the free spirit who changed from friend to lover through seven years of emails.

Learning of her husband`s affair, Ms. Sanford shortly called a lawyer to see how to prepare for divorce. After offering her husband contracted secrecy if he stopped his extramarital relationship, she hoped he would feel lonely when she moved their sons, against their wishes, out of the governor`s mansion at the beginning of their summer break. She also asked her husband to leave their beach home.

No wonder, after weeks of his wife`s cutting off his communication with her, the governor found growing attraction in his welcoming lover. Ms. Sanford`s failed strategies to shock, manipulate and change her husband into reversing his attraction to Belen probably enlarged his preference for heart connection elsewhere. After his early mistakes of involving his wife too much in his public career, Ms. Sanford reacted during their crisis over his affair by moving in the opposite direction, taking steps away from communicating with him.

Still, she felt she did her best, ending the book with ennobling self-affirmation: `I have lived these married years as loyally, as honestly, as lovingly and as committed as I could.`

The profound soul searching involved in a long marriage`s ending is here given thoughtful articulation.